Old McDonald Had a Farm; W-O-O-D-V-I-L-L-E

Last night I was leaving church and had only gotten about a half of a mile up the road. A couple from church were right in front of me and Cousin was in front of them. I was a little spaced out thinking about how we were all going the same direction and that we would be looking like a caravan driving through town. Then I saw a guy from town that I know trying to walk across the road. Back in the day he and I were friends, however "life" happened so now we're just friendly acquaintances. He's a good ol' country boy: he drinks, hunts, goes fishing, gets dirty at work, takes his hat off every time he walks inside, always says "yes ma'am" and "no ma'am," etc. It was dark-dusk outside and I almost didn't see him. It all happened so quickly that I didn't have time to figure out why he was walking across the road. Then, as I got right up to him, and was about to smile and wave, he proceeds to cuss me like a dog. I was taken aback. As I passed him by, I was mad at how badly he had just cussed me. Then it occurred to me that something must have been back there, but I hadn't seen anything because he had all of my attention. Just then Cousin called me. She said, "Did you see that!?" I said, "NO! What was it? I just got cussed out over it." Then she said, "It was a pig trying to cross the road!"

Now tell me, how many places can you go where you are in danger of running over a pig? The thing is... this was not the first time that I have had such an encounter with a pig. Yesterday was actually like driving on a farm without fences. As I was on my way to Sunday School, I saw another cow; this one was across the road from its pasture and was eating the neighbor's grass. The same people that always have loose cows also have loose chickens that camp out in the road. The chickens make me so mad that I don't even slow down for them anymore. Then yesterday, as we were on our way home from lunch, we saw a wild turkey standing near the side of the road. The pig thing happened after church. Then last night as I was on my way home from Cousin's house, I turned onto one of the back-roads and I saw no less than twenty deer in the field. And that doesn't count how many squirrels, rabbits, raccoons, possums, cats, and dogs I see running around in the road on a daily basis.

Of course, I would rather live someplace where I was dodging animals on a daily basis verses living someplace where I dodged thugs with guns pointed at my face. There are a few more little interesting stories from yesterday, but I'll save those for future blogs.